My husband ROCKS!

I am lucky to be with a guy who is just plain awesome. Yeah, we are like all the married couples that have their struggles but I can't imagine spending my life with none only than the one and only Jeff Longie. He is a unique mind, I tell you. He's done a fabulous job of taking care of me during this surgery experience and I want to see if I can come up with a few  things that describe his awesomeness.

1.  He loves unconditionally with an enormous amount of loyalty. This man has been through a roller coaster ride dealing with a person like me and has chosen to love me unconditionally through all of it. He also loves with an extreme amount of loyalty and is very, very protective. If anyone comes close to even saying something that remotely hurts someone he loves or considers a friend, you better watch out, because the rath of Jeff Longie is not a pretty thing.

2.  He is a GREAT father. Jeff is a big kid himself, as I think all men are. Some hide that big kid quality and some don't hide it so well. For some women, it's irritating as hell. For me, I adore this quality in him.  He has taught me how to be a child around my children; how to engage the fun side of being a parent. For Father's Day this past year, I bought him a Nerf gun that he'd been eying for months and his adult side couldn't justify spending $30 for it. He giggled like a school girl when he got it and has already talked about how he's going to "mod" it out. He's shown me what playing with children actually is and has soothed my fears of being a good mom because I didn't know how to do that with my kids.

3.  He is a natural born rebel. I fell in love with Jeff's rebellious side instantly because I'm a rebel myself. He is not afraid to go against what is normal and what may be considered right in society. I admire this quality in him because I have always believed in standing up for what you believe is right regardless if everyone tells you that you are wrong. I flash back to a day when I was running and daydreaming about an imaginary party that will happen when Jeff and I hit 10 years of marriage because it always takes the "run" out of running for me. I was thinking about how the party would go and daydreaming about how the renewal of the vows part would run in my head. When I came to this characteristic, I got all chocked up and almost had to stop running. I didn't realize it was a quality about him that I admired so much. It falls into place with what values I want my children to learn and how I live my life, so I appreciate this quality dearly.

4.  He is SO funny. Just the other night, our babysitter had no idea who The Jeffersons were. Well, it's because she was born in 1988!!! I won't even touch on how old that made us feel. So, I did what any other person would do, grabbed my lap top and "you.tubed" the video, showed it to her. Right in the middle of it, Jeff walks in, yanks his pajama pants up to his chest and does the infamous Jeff dance which consists of moving his hips back and forth in a forward and then back motion while moving his arms in the opposite direction, all the way to our bathroom, turns around and points his index fingers down like George use to and walks towards us, screaming  "MOVING ON UPPP!". Who couldn't laugh at that seriously!? Me and our babysitter were rolling on the floor laughing, it was that funny.

5.  He is sensitive. This really makes being a woman much easier, really. If I didn't have a guy that was sensitive, I don't know what I would do. Jeff has his "girly" moments just like I have mine. He PMS's the way that I do and I think that it's cool.  I love it because he can relate to me when I have my "girly" days. He also tears up at a precious picture of our children, any child really, and adores animals. Children and animals are drawn to him, instantly. About a week ago, he told me every time he sees a baby, it makes him want another one. SEE! He gets what women go through when they get that longing to have and to hold another baby in their arms. I think what contributed to this was because 8 weeks after Jessie was born, he played the role of Mr. Mom while I went back to work for a year. He adored her and so wishes he could go back to those moments when our babies were little. Anytime I see this side of him makes me appreciate the heart he has; it's what makes him beautiful.

Surgery number four on the girl parts...a lose-lose situation

I've always been a writer, since high school English class with Mrs. Inabinet, probably even before then, but I don't remember so well. I've also wanted to always do a blog but always made excuses for it.

ANYWAYS, what better time to do it than while I'm recovering from this stupid surgery. It's stupid in my mind. I know it's necessary and it deals with my health, but quite frankly, it's just like having to go pee, it takes so much time to go in, pull down your pants, sit on the toilet, do your thing (rolling the eyes), tear the tissue while battling whether really which way is the right way for the roll to be on, wipe, pull up your pants, flush, and go about your business. Now if you're a mom I dare you to try and go pee when your two year old is asleep. In my house, I would come out of the bathroom and my hallway wall would be covered in a new color - SHARPIE. Nope, didn't stutter, yes, Sharpie, marker because my two year old decided that nap time wasn't going to happen that day. That was fun.

So this surgery is just as irritating as having to pee in the middle of writing a paper or cooking dinner or heaven forbid, talking on the phone. It's irritating because it's gonna take me about two weeks to not walk like a 70 year old and 4 weeks before I'm exercising, still working on that battle to lose the last 10 lbs of my 2 year old. That is another story for a different day, I tell ya. I'm slightly impatient when it comes to things and just now after 30 years realizing this.I understand it's unrealistic, but I still am aggravated that it takes a month for your body to recover from a surgery. I mean, now, they can go in and replace parts and make life expectancy about 20 years older and you can basically get a catalog ordered baby, packed with your own eye color, stature, and hair style, but it still takes FOREVER to get back to normal from removing a little blood and scar tissue? There's gotta be a pill for speedy recovery, there's gotta be.

In case your curious, surgery number four on the girl parts included removing blood from my pelvic cavity and abdominal cavity. The docs also removed scar tissue "aka" adhesions from my left ovary and small intestine. Apparently, my menstrual blood decided it was going to go backwards into my pelvic cavity and not into my uterus like it's supposed to. My husband has called my girl parts "an angry beaver" before...there's a new definition of it. These adhesions formed when after I was sewed up from my two c-sections. Apparently, scar tissue forms to heal the body and my body decided my left ovary was broken and my small intestine was broken and needed extra tissue. The doc also informed me that I had quite a bit of scar tissue on the bladder caused from one of my c-sections. I didn't know this but they sometimes injure the bladder when they cut you open. This would explain the repeated bladder infections and the colicky cramping I get. The third surgery was to remove some ovarian cysts from the left ovary, and the other two were my c-sections for my lovely children.

My mom, after telling her about the ovarian cyst surgery, recommended getting a hysterectomy. At the time, I was still dreamy eyed about not doing that because what if something were to happen to the kids, what if something happened to me and Jeff, would removing my girl parts make me less of a woman? A year later, talking to the doctor who did this surgery and enduring four ovarian cysts rupturing, I asked him if he could PLEASE remove at least the left ovary. Yeah, I was serious because being a woman, already has it's sucky moments, but no woman should have to endure the rupturing of a cyst AFTER giving birth to children. You've put in your time, done your duty, after bearing children. I'm still pissed women have to go through menopause and get ridiculed for it. "HA, HA" the doc said, "You're ovaries are still in great shape despite the complications you've had." Other women tell me "No, I know friends who did just a partial hysterectomy and struggled to get the hormone cocktail correct." What flashes through my mind is my poor husband's face when the Exorcist in me decides it wants to come out and I have no control what so ever, very similar to what pregnancy was. This person, hell, I wouldn't even call it a person, this hormone devil, came and took over my body when I was pregnant and said and did things I, Amanda, would never, ever, say or do. I can't do that to me and Jeff again, we've been through it twice. I need to give him a few years before he has to go through that again.

So here I sit, with my angry girl parts, injured and full of piss and vinegar. I'm here for a reason though. I think that reason is to slow down and to not be superwoman any more; I have a strange feeling my body doesn't like it too much...three years and two surgeries...HMMM.  I'm lucky because I have great friends and a great family. My girl friends have brought over meals for a whole week and my in laws, who I think of like my mom and dad, have helped Jeff take care of our kids and him this weekend. Tonight, I've gotten to create something that I've wanted to create for years, so really, this surgery isn't a lose-lose situation...turn that frown upside down, girl, it's a win-win. :)